I'm really into asian looking animals
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
wow bdsm is so cute
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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