he puts the penis in happiness.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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