Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
