Texts From Last Night

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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.

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  (337): I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way. http://tfl.nu/vl3g
  Replies (3) Good night (777) Bad night (1685)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  where are my pants?

  (1-219): View more from Indiana

  you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm

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  (219): where are my pants? (1-219): you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm http://tfl.nu/h936
  Replies (14) Good night (4911) Bad night (742)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.

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  (205): It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette. http://tfl.nu/u0k7
  Replies (30) Good night (7240) Bad night (1170)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.

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  (910): I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive. http://tfl.nu/9t3w
  Replies (13) Good night (4490) Bad night (1062)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10

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  (559): Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10 http://tfl.nu/1xln
  Replies (13) Good night (7041) Bad night (992)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls

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  (508): I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls http://tfl.nu/izkj
  Replies (4) Good night (2030) Bad night (1420)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.

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  (505): new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse. http://tfl.nu/qxpq
  Replies (6) Good night (2562) Bad night (760)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.

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  (330): I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned. http://tfl.nu/myfn
  Replies (17) Good night (4018) Bad night (970)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?

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  (207): did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in? http://tfl.nu/zbg4
  Replies (10) Good night (2991) Bad night (1198)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.

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  (303): I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes. http://tfl.nu/g3e8
  Replies (4) Good night (1114) Bad night (484)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.

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  (765): Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater. http://tfl.nu/rsqd
  Replies (4) Good night (1576) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.

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  (203): we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date. http://tfl.nu/dia7
  Replies (10) Good night (835) Bad night (1456)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept

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  (502): How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept http://tfl.nu/59ls
  Replies (13) Good night (542) Bad night (1668)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water

  (1-574): View more from Indiana

  desperate times, desperate measures

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  (574): most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water (1-574): desperate times, desperate measures http://tfl.nu/2k3a
  Replies (8) Good night (584) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships

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  (765): We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships http://tfl.nu/ywdr
  Replies (1) Good night (353) Bad night (112)

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