no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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