you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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