I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
