i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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