you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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