My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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