You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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