My brain says no but my pants say off.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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