just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I smell like Dick and happiness
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
