ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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