I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
NoShamevember. You game?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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