is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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