at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
It's Friday. Sex?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
