I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
