And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Randomize
