we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
