i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
