question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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