craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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