I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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