we're blogging at a bar
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
