There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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