Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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