we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I touched a dick in church today
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize