i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.