he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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