she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
