im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize