I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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