It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
