Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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