his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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