Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
