Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
im holly from the hills drunk
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize
