With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize
