Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I don't think brook has ever known best
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
