I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
