Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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