are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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