I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
this just has baby written all over it
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Houston, we have a squirter
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
