She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
