i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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