do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
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It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
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never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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