what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
