sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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