we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
