Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
