My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
